How to Ensure You Don’t Burn Out Meeting the Needs of Others

Do you ever worry that you won’t have what it takes to keep giving, loving, and caring for the people who depend on you? Burnout can be all too real for family caregivers, ministry leaders, and those who put the needs of others before their own. My friend Lori Schumaker, a Christian writer, has experienced this reality first-hand and has some wise words on how to ensure you don’t burn out meeting the needs of others.

How to Ensure You Don’t Burn Out Meeting the Needs of Others

by Lori Schumaker

Burnout can have catastrophic results if you don’t recognize and respond to your symptoms early. Statistics show that 40% to 70% of family caregivers have clinically significant symptoms of depression and other emotional health complications. The same kind of statistics exist for physical health.

Meeting the needs of others is both rewarding and difficult. Because it is such an others-centered calling, obliviousness to personal needs frequents the caregiver’s life. And often, even if you are aware of the increasing physical and mental health complications you are experiencing, you may be too overwhelmed to devise a helpful action plan.

My Burnout Experience

These statistics didn’t surprise me. They confirmed what I’d personally experienced and what I’d witnessed in others. I felt the symptoms of burnout long before I did anything about it. I thought that if I dug in, focused, and prayed a lot, the symptoms would pass. But they didn’t.

I not only ended up burned out but also experienced both empathy fatigue and blocked care. I began going through the caregiving motions but only felt anxiety and depression. My emotional state triggered a flare-up in already existing health issues and contributed to new ones. Fibromyalgia, chronic migraines, chronic hyperinflammatory disease, anxiety, depression, and memory loss, to name only a few.

In my feeble attempts to cope, I withdrew. I hid it well when I had to, but I stepped away from ministry and distanced myself from social situations because hiding it was hard work. It was all I could do to love the ones God gave me. I was ashamed. How did I get here when I’m a Bible-believing Christian who knows the power of God available to me? I write about hope, joy, and confidence through Christ. The enemy was surely rejoicing over my struggle.

Looking Back

Oh, friend, there are things I’d do differently if I could. I’d get help sooner. I’d set boundaries and not feel guilty for taking care of myself. Yet I know God uses all things together for the good of those who love Him. (Romans 8:28). So, I wouldn’t be here to encourage you today without my struggle. I wouldn’t be here to remind you that God knows all about burnout and tells us about it in the Bible. Thousands of years ago, He planned for the struggles we would have today. He made sure we’d know we weren’t alone and don’t need to feel ashamed.

Elijah, the Powerful Prophet

Let’s dive into the account of Elijah, one of the Bible’s most powerful prophets. We find his story in the book of 1 Kings.

Although Elijah was one of the most powerful prophets in the Bible, he still experienced burnout and depression after a series of intense events over a short period of time. He had confronted King Ahab and his idolatrous wife Jezebel, challenged 450 false prophets, which resulted in all 450 being executed, prayed for rain to end a drought, and outran a chariot by the power of God. What triumph he experienced!

Elijah Wanted to Die

But the triumph radically turned to despair as Elijah reached the end of his emotional strength. Jezebel issued a death warrant for Elijah, so he fled for his life. He left his servant behind and went into the wilderness, asking God to take his life. Elijah felt alone, exhausted, and hopeless.

“But he himself went a day’s journey into the wilderness, and came and sat down under a broom tree. And he prayed that he might die, and said, “It is enough! Now, Lord, take my life, for I am no better than my fathers!” 

(1 Kings 19:4 NKJV)

God Provided What Elijah Needed

God did not answer his prayer for death, but instead twice sent an angel to provide him with food and water. The Lord also told Elijah to go to Mount Horeb, where He would meet with him. There, God revealed Himself to Elijah in a gentle whisper, not in a powerful wind, earthquake, or fire. He assured him that he was not alone but that there were seven thousand faithful people in Israel who had not bowed to Baal. He also gave him a new mission: to anoint new kings and a successor, Elisha. God gave Elijah his next steps. He guided him toward continued purpose. Burnout didn’t mean the end. It meant time to heal was needed.

Elijah’s story shows us that burnout and depression happen. It happens for even the most faithful servants of God. It shows us that we may experience tremendous success and do all the good things of God, but if we push too far, we can fall into depression. And then suddenly, our perception distorts, and we see only failure instead of the good that God has done through us.

Time to Recover

As humans, we reach a point where we need time to recover. And in that time, God does not abandon us. He is there in our times of need. The Lord provides us with physical and spiritual nourishment, comfort, guidance, and purpose.

God also reminds us that we are part of a larger community of believers.

“Yet I have reserved seven thousand in Israel, all whose knees have not bowed to Baal, and every mouth that has not kissed him.” 

(1 Kings 19:18)

Recognizing the Symptoms of Burnout

To ensure you do not experience burnout, you must stay aware of yourself and the symptoms you are experiencing. It is easy to ignore yourself when caring for others. Usually, ignoring a symptom does not make it go away!

Symptoms of Burnout:

1. Fatigue or tiredness
2. Negative thought cycles
3. New or exaggerated fear
4. Paranoia
5. Weight problems
6. Anxiety or hypervigilance
7. Physical pain
8. Sleep issues
9. Distorted perceptions
10. High blood pressure
11. Emotional exhaustion
12. Loss of joy
13. Loss of courage
14. New or worsening insecurity
15. Depression
16. Anger at others and God
17. Irrational or false guilt
18. A lack of meaning in life; spiritual drought

14 Ways to Heal From or Ensure You Don’t Burn Out

The strategies listed below can serve dual purposes. If you can do these things regularly, you will have a better chance of meeting the needs of others while staying healthy yourself. However, we are fallible. So, when you notice a new or increasing symptom, assess this list and determine which strategies need strengthening.

1. Set boundaries

Set boundaries to protect yourself both physically and mentally.

2. Self-care

Sleep, eat, and exercise to stay healthy.

3. Make time for fun, laughter, and creative expression.

4. Take Purposeful Time Off

Plan a day, a weekend, a week -whatever possible – away. It may feel too complicated to arrange everything so you can leave, but it’s necessary.

5. Connect with others

Connect with others who not only support you, make you laugh, and see the positives in life. We need others to help us through. Those people should be people that listen but don’t let you get stuck in a pit of negativity.

6. Don’t give up on your time with Jesus.

Make your Bible/devotional/study time your top priority. Leaning on Jesus will give you the wisdom, energy, and strength to see and do the next right thing. His power lifts your spirit and gives you hope. You can focus so intently on your purpose that you lose connection with the presence of God.

7. Kick irrational guilt to the curb!

Have grace for yourself and treat yourself as you would treat others. Don’t expect more out of yourself than you would ask of others!

8. Know that your true identity is in Christ.

You are valuable because God says you are. You are His treasured child, and He wants the best for you. Knowing who you are and how valuable you are to Christ will help you minimize mental drainers such as comparison, fear, and insecurity.

9. Get professional help for your mental health struggles.

Codependency, trauma, addiction, depression, anxiety, and more must be worked through with a certified Christian counselor. I also firmly believe in good inner healing prayer ministries in conjunction with counseling. A certified life coach can help through issues such as motivation, procrastination, or overwhelm. Stressful situations bring hidden weaknesses and dysfunction to the surface. You can’t be of the best service to others without dealing with your issues.

10. Take care of any physical medical issues.

Don’t procrastinate!

11. Release bitterness or resentment.

Your situation is not fair. But bitterness only poisons the one who ingests it. Release with forgiveness anyone who has hurt you. Also, release any subconscious resentment toward anyone needing your extensive care.

12. Avoid the success trap.

Success is good until it becomes your motivating factor. Success does not equivalate your worth. Ask yourself how Jesus would describe success in your unique situation.

13. Start Slow

After a significant episode of burnout, don’t try to reengage right where you left off. You will overload your system again. Start slow. Tighten those boundaries while you heal and transition back into your roles.

14. Reevaluate past episodes of burnout.

Where did it go wrong? What is God showing you through this event? Confront the cause of your burnout so that you may learn and grow.

What steps have you taken to ensure that you don’t burn out?

As a wife, adoptive, biological, and special needs mom, teacher, author, and speaker, Lori’s heart is to encourage others to live a hope-filled life through Christ. Wherever you find yourself today, through Lori’s freelance writing and her blog at www.LoriSchumaker.com, you can find tools to help you make sense of God’s love for you, strengthen your faith, and bravely learn to live a surrendered life. In her award-winning book, Surrendered Hearts, she weaves lessons of letting go, trusting, and living surrendered to Jesus through the telling of her family’s adoption story. 

Lori has been featured on Christian websites, including iBelieve and Crosswalk. Her work can also be found in several devotional book compilations. You can connect with her on her website or through Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Pinterest, and YouTube.

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