Suicide: Are You Worried You Don’t Have What It Takes to Keep Going?

Have you ever worried that you don’t have what it takes to keep going? Perhaps even contemplated suicide? You are not alone. No matter how isolated or hopeless you feel, it’s important to remember that it doesn’t have to stay that way. In this article, my friend Tammy Kennington will share what actions to take when you feel like giving up.

Nobody knows the depths of hopelessness better than those who have experienced it themselves. Tammy is no different. After struggling through times of despair, Tammy has recognized the immense value of taking action and partnering with the Lord. She will also share some statements to listen for in others that might indicate they are struggling.

Suicide: Are You Worried You Don’t Have What It Takes to Keep Going?

By Tammy Kennington

The plan seemed foolproof. Painless. Uncomplicated. But I knew my husband and children would deal with the aftermath–my solution to emotional heartache and a traumatic past. During those times when a battle waged within, God often reminded me that suffering would pass—even when I worried I didn’t have what it takes to keep going.

What to do when you feel hopeless or think about suicide?

Can you relate to hopelessness or despair? Statistics indicate nearly half of all teens and more than one-fourth of adults experience ongoing hopelessness. One in twenty-five of these individuals struggle with suicidal ideation.

How do you fight the temptation to give up when suffering takes its toll? When trauma, trials, or trouble taunt you with the lie that life will never improve?

As someone who spent more than her share of time in hopelessness, I discovered the value of taking action. While remaining in our pain entrenches us in the chasm of no man’s land, we find safety behind the lines when we partner with the Lord. He will uphold you through your wilderness days, but you must:

• Recognize God’s power to sustain you—no matter your circumstances.
• Decide your life has a purpose.
• Seek help from a Biblical counselor or therapist.
• Create a safety plan.

When You Don’t Feel You Have What It Takes

The steps listed above sound simple enough when one feels optimistic. But when despair spins like a hurricane within the soul, how does one manage?

1. Spend time in Christ’s presence.

Jesus, whose body wept blood in overwhelming anguish, understands emotional pain. Invite Him to shepherd you through yours; remember, He will never abandon you.

2. Memorize verses about the value of life.

Write or type the words onto notecards and place them around your house, office, and any other area where you spend significant time. Recite each verse aloud when you see it and use them as prayer prompts.

3. Capture each errant thought and make it obedient to Christ.

(2 Corinthians 10:5-7) Rebuke the arrows of the Enemy aloud. Then, recite a verse that proclaims God’s truth over you.

4. Create a list of coping strategies.

Stress and anxiety may lead to difficulties in concentration or focus. Preparing a reference can help when overwhelm strikes. Some strategies might include exercising, engaging in a hobby, spending time outside, or praying.

5. In crisis? Seek help.

When our thoughts grow dark and dangerous, we need an empathetic companion willing to walk the rocky path with us. Who will you contact in moments of crisis? Post a list of at least three people, including their contact information, in an accessible area. Along with those individuals, include the number of the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline (988) and your counselor’s name with contact information.

Indicators Someone You Love Feels She Does Not Have What It Takes

Hopelessness and helplessness often accompany one another. People experiencing despair may need assistance acquiring what they need—including counseling. Phrases indicating they may be a danger to themselves include the following:

• Things will never change.
• It doesn’t matter anymore.
• There is no future.
• I give up.

If someone makes statements like those above, do not be afraid to ask, “Are you thinking about hurting yourself?” You will not plant an idea in someone’s head. However, you may protect a loved one from making a rash and permanent decision. If she responds in the affirmative, follow up with, “Do you have a plan?” Based on her answer, you may need to seek immediate help at the local emergency room. Or call the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988 for assistance.

Causes of Hopelessness

1. Forgetting God

Job 8:11-13 TLB reads, “Those who forget God have no hope. They are like rushes without any mire to grow in, or grass without water to keep it alive. Suddenly, it begins to wither, even before it is cut.” Scripture reveals that, for many, the root of hopelessness rests in forgetfulness. In forsaking Him. In refusing to embrace faith.

2. The Sting of Rejection

Others, like Jeremiah, struggle with hopelessness because of rejection or loneliness. A prophet since his youth, Jeremiah never married and lived a solitary life as a ridiculed, dejected man. Scripture records his hopeless words, “Cursed be the day in which I was born! Let the day not be blessed in which my mother bore me!” (Jeremiah 20:14 NKJV)

3. Lack of Control

Some feel hopeless because life seems out of control. Untamable. Feral. In a world consumed by unquenchable fires, looming wars, and economic chaos, hopelessness has harnessed the hearts and minds of many. Believer, we can live free of that burden. Jesus told us that He overcame the world (John 16:33) and proved it by stepping out of his tomb three days after His death.

4. Overwhelmed by Grief

A major cause of hopelessness, grief sometimes derails the faithful. After losing her husband and two sons, Naomi renamed herself Mara. What is the meaning of her new moniker? Bitter. A soul burdened by dire circumstances sometimes lacks the ability to envision life beyond struggle. But because of His faithfulness, we can depend on the Lord to meet our needs. Provide solace in our suffering. In Naomi’s situation, God provided a devoted companion who bore a son who delighted the bereaved woman’s heart. The gentle Shepherd will also tend to those dealing with grief.

Reasons for Hopefulness

1. Never Abandoned

We may neglect the Lord, but He remains steadfast. Hebrews 13:5 (NKJV) reassures us, “For He Himself has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” The Father guides us through every shadowy swale and withered wasteland to the place of Promise. In the in-between? We learn to revel in His presence and seek Him in our need.

2. You Belong

In an age of cancel culture and political division, opinions threaten to dismantle professional and familial relationships. Divisiveness, discord, and derision parade across social media feeds, news channels, and public gatherings. The King of Kings, who calls each believer His own, never casts His loved ones aside. Instead, Jesus endured canceling at our cost that we might belong to Him.

3. A Sure Future

The power of the One who spoke the void into beauty still holds all power in a whisper. All tumult, confusion, and fear will shatter at His command. Paul–who endured lashings, stoning, shipwrecks, and imprisonment—exhorts, “For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.” (Romans 8:17 NIV)

4. Comfort and Restoration

Jesus wept. Like us, Christ grieved the loss of those He loved. He empathizes with us in our heartache. More than that, He sends the Comforter to wrap us in arms of love and promises an eternity free of death or anguish. Our solution to loss is not discovered in taking our own lives but in the giving of Christ’s life on the cross.

I peer into my past and thank God for staying my hand. For tenderly calling my name and speaking purpose into my life. If you feel you don’t have what it takes to keep going, the Lord longs for you to know He sees your hurting heart and hears your wounded cries. Keep moving through the desert. Do you see it? The Jordan lies beyond the horizon.

Tammy Kennington is a writer and speaker familiar with the impact of trauma, mental health issues, and parenting in the hard places. Her desire is to lead women from hardship to hope and to share the love of Christ with the young and young at heart.  

You can meet with Tammy as she blogs weekly at www.tammykennington.com or subscribe to receive a monthly dose of hope. 

You can also connect with Tammy on Instagram Tammy L Kennington (@tammylkennington)  

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