Has your year been full of letdowns with numerous unexpected circumstances? My guess, if this is true, is it has led to a bit of discontentment at times. However, with a few good choices, we don’t have to dwell in this place. Discover what to do when you are disappointed.
Steps to Take When You Are Disappointed
Step One: Choose to Accept
At first, acceptance might feel a little counterintuitive. It feels like we are giving up, allowing what we don’t desire, and admitting change will never happen.
However, this couldn’t be further from the truth. When we fail to accept our circumstances, it keeps us stuck on not wanting things the way they are. This failure to accept only adds to our misery.
My Failure to Accept
On Monday, my husband and I left Kansas for home. As we traveled along the highway, the weather got increasingly worse. Signs flashed above, “Icy Roads.” Then, the snow increased as we arrived in Colorado, and it was relentless!
However, we were determined to keep going. After all, we wanted to be in the comfort of our own home, and we had expectations of working on Monday. Plus, I wasn’t too keen on spending the night in a hotel we found along the highway. However, as we moved along, we began to lose count of the cars that had slid off the road. As we crept along, barely moving, my map app once again rerouted us off the highway to a side road. When we glanced over to the adjacent freeway, it had come to a complete stop. At this point, we had no choice but to accept our fate.
We were lucky to find a room. Yet, with it snowing like crazy, we found ourselves stuck in a hotel with no food in sight. My attitude was stuck on what I had expected and what I didn’t want. After all, my recommendation was to leave two days after the storm had passed. For some reason, I felt it was my duty to keep reminding my husband of this fact.
Do you ever keep hounding when you are disappointed?
I awakened in the morning with hunger pangs and a heart full of discontent. Pulling on my warmest clothes to be found, I reluctantly went down for the free breakfast, wearing dirty clothes.
As I sat there alone, the tears began to roll down my face as I waited for my meal. Quickly I looked around, hoping no one was noticing. It had been a tough week, and explaining it was not at the top of my list of conversations to have.
On Friday in Kansas, we said our final goodbye to my 93-year-old aunt. No doubt, she had lived a good life, and we will see her once again in heaven. However, that didn’t take away the pain or the fact I can no longer call at my whim and hear – “How’s my girl.” All week, I tried to be brave and refused to accept that the loss was real and hurt.
Finally, I reluctantly decided to accept my circumstances. After all, it is what it is. I bowed my head in prayer and thanked God for keeping us safe and providing a warm place to sleep.
As I opened my eyes, this sweet little lady came bustling over to offer me a plate of food. I watched her run from one thing to the next, trying to meet the patrons’ needs and apologizing profusely for not having enough. She was an angel in disguise.
Step Two: Surrender it All to God
When we are disappointed, God wants us to share it with Him. Jesus understands our earthly pain and wants to comfort us. He can even handle it when we are disappointed. with Him. In “When You are Disappointed with God.” I share a time in my life when I erected a big wall and wouldn’t let God in.
Step Three: Count Your Blessings
Once I accepted my circumstances, gratitude burst from my soul. The present moment came alive with God’s blessings. Yes, the disappointment was still there, but it didn’t seem to matter anymore. My eyes darted outside, and I caught a glimpse of fall and winter all at the same time. Of course, that beauty was always there, but it was hiding under my misery and disappointment. Thank you, Lord.
What helps you when you are disappointed?
Grace & Truth Christian Link-Up
Featured Post
Our featured post this week is from Mariel Davenport. She not only shares how to move past our disappointment but lets us know what we will find when we do. Yes, acceptance is part of it, but I will let her add how to arm against disappointment. It is key, and I had skipped it that morning in my rush to get on our way.
Now for our Featured Post
“How to Move Past Disappointment”
By Mariel Davenport
Click here to read.
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Awww, Maree. I’m so sorry about the loss of your aunt and that you caught in our Colorado squall. Thank you for sharing so honestly about your disappointment. Your three tips for dealing with disappointment are spot on.
When I am disappointed, sometimes my first step is that good cry you mentioned. And then it’s being honest about what I’m feeling and taking that to the Lord. And yes, choosing to count blessings is a great tip to get my eyes off of me and onto the many good things God is doing, is offering.
I’m glad you made it home safely.
Jeanne, Thank you for your kind words. It was nice to get home finally, and I have been enjoying my sweet memories of my Aunt. I hope you are having a great weekend. Maree
I Love your candor here Maree, only this week did I have a similar experience & said the same ‘it is what it is & I can’t change it,’ it’s over to you now Lord. And the blessings revealed themselves 😀
My post for this week is “Tea in the Vineyards”
https://teawithjennifer.blog/2020/10/30/tea-in-the-vineyards/
Bless you,
Jennifer
Jennifer, Isn’t’ it amazing how the blessings jump out at us once we surrender. Maree
Thanks for preaching to me today. I needed it.
I am so glad my words spoke to you. Maree
Thank you, Maree for your transparency as always in sharing situations where you know you could’ve done better. It is such a blessing to know someone else struggles exactly as I do sometimes. I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your Aunt. No matter when or under what circumstances, saying good-bye on this earth to a loved one is never easy. Thank you for sharing Mariel’s post, I read that ne previously and was greatly blessed and encouraged.
Donna,
Thank you for your kind words. Yes, I will miss my Aunt. You are so right; no matter what the circumstances, good-bye on earth is never easy. I am trying to take a moment and recognize that instead of diminishing the pain with the platitudes, we tell ourselves.
I am glad to know I am not alone. Thank you for sharing.
Maree
I could relate so much to this. When I let my disappoint take charge I’m miserable, and I make everyone else in my wake miserable too. Beautiful reminder of the hope on the other side when we surrender.
Oh yes, we do make those around us miserable too. Thank you for your kind words. I hope your day is spectacular. Maree
Yes, yes, Maree … in acceptance and gratitude lies peace. That might be one of 2020’s biggest lessons.
Linda, Yes, and isn’t that peace amazing. I hope you have a wonderful day. Maree
Maree,
Accepting what is can be terribly difficult. Unmet expectations can leave me squirming. But, like you pointed out, gratitude goes a long way to curing the “grumbles.” It’s hard to give thanks and complain at the same time. Going, now, to sign up for your Nov. gratitude challenge.
Blessings,
Bev xx
Bev, So true, it is hard to give thanks and complain at the same time. I am so glad you are joining us for our gratitude challenge. I look forward to hearing your blessings. Maree
As I read your post, I was thinking of Amy Carmichael’s saying about there being peace in acceptance–then I saw Mariel had included it in her post! Sometimes it’s hard to accept something by faith, knowing God is in control, even when the disappointed feelings are still here. But acceptance helps to change those feelings and trust in Him and see His hand.
Barbara – I couldn’t agree more with what you said. It never ceases to amaze me the peace I feel after accepting and letting God have it. Thank you for your words. Maree